Today is the midpoint of July – the month is half over, and with it goes the first half of the summer. As such, it is also good time to check in with the progress I have made since I began this endeavor, this electronic diary of self-liberation, at the end of May. I have had three stories accepted for publication, applied to what seems like thousands of freelance jobs and actually been accepted for a handful of them (so exciting). I have expanded my blog and built out my site myself (totally empowering experience), and I have joined many writing communities and websites like Elance, Hubpages, and eHow. I have two novels and a picture book started and in various stages of development, and I have formed friendships with writers who I never imagined would waste three minutes talking to me.
Yet the most important accomplishment of these past two months has been the mental shift that I have made and the control I have taken in my own life. When I started this blog, one of my big goals was to find the strength to be able to walk away from the security of my corporate job. Now, not a full two months later, I have a plan in place to make my exit and write full time. Am I still a little scared? Yes! Am I %100 thrilled? Yes!
For me, opening myself up to the scary, yet potentially rewarding possibilities of leaving the safe, predictable life of a corporate job for a full freelancing career is the result of some serious mental work. I am not someone who handles uncertainty well, or a lack of security. Spontaneity, I am sorry to say, isn’t one of my strong points.
Yet here I am, one foot out to door, one precariously perched on a future dedicated to writing and self exploration and betterment.
But you know what, I am not nearly as frightened about this uncertain future as I (knowing myself) should be. I feel confident, calm, and like I am doing the right (write) thing for me. And that feels wonderful. This confidence is also allowing me to wipe away my angst at my current job and appreciate these last few months at a lovely company filled with lovely people. Just because it isn’t my cup of tea doesn’t mean I can slander the good folks and effort that is done there, and that is something I see so much more clearly now that I am on my own track toward what I really want.
Like my dad said to me the other day, channeling his inner Atticus Finch: “Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore.”
Let’s head out into the open water, baby. I’m ready now.
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It’s great that you are at the point that you can say you are going to write.
It is scary and amazing at the same time, but you can do it. All it takes is to plan and then hang on for the ride of a lifetime.