As I was typing away at my computer the other day, I found myself subconsciously thinking about the destination.
The destination in my mind is this image I’ve had of what I wanted to be since I was about 12. And just like all thoughts about life when you are 12, the image as to who I would be and what my life would be like is about as two dimensional as a Disney movie.
While you all know how much I like goal setting and working to achieve dreams, the destination is something else entirely, and unfortunately a lot more sinister. It is an ending place, a place that – once you have reached it – supposedly you will be happy and fulfilled, and stagnant, for the rest of your life.
We all have these destinations in our minds. They call out to us, from our subconscious, like sirens, pulling us away from the perception that life is a journey and telling us that we are going toward one end where Eden awaits.
Some people will known this sensation as the “if I could just do/get/be this, then I will be happy.”
Have you ever found yourself thinking that?
“If I could just lose the weight, then I will be happy.”
“If I could just pay off this debt, then I will be happy.”
“If I could just get married, then I will be happy.”
“If I could just make $1 million dollars, then I would be happy.”
“If I could just be more productive or have more energy, then I would be happy.”
These are destinations. They are things we see as ultimate goals, if you will, that once achieved will make our lives like fairy tales.
As I found myself having a destination moment, a new thought flashed through my mind: “then what?”
All systems stopped – well, what did I mean, “then what?” Then nothing, then life is perfect, right?
Well, it might be improved, but that isn’t the end of the journey.
I suddenly had this image of achieving my destination – that place that is supposed to make everything roses – and then I had an image of the day after I achieved it. And the next day. And the next year. And the next ten years.
What was supposed to happen to me after that? Who was I going to become after that? Where was I going to go after that?
It completely surprised me to realized that in spite of myself, I still held onto these types of feelings. I am someone who loves growth. I love learning, improving, becoming better and more capable. That is what I live for (personal development is kinda all about always growing!). I believe completely in the journey and the fact that you never stop changing – so I was shocked that while my conscious mind was working, another part of me was harboring these feelings.
The reason I wanted to share this with you today is I feel like it is important for all of us to be vigilant for these types of feelings. These false destinations, these mirages, can easily mimic real goals and dreams. Yet the one difference is that they promise to have the answer to all our problems, while a real goal just promises to improve ourselves and move us forward.
So as you examine your Uncommon Life and your Uncommon Goals, I ask you: are you focuses on your destination, or on actual, forward moving goals?
Here’s to your Uncommon Life,
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